What you learn in college...

What you learn in college cannot be found in a book.

Things like...

-Quarters are priceless treasures that are to be saved and used only for laundry.
-Said laundry may or may not be done once in a three-week period.
-Minutes are actually 120 seconds long on Fridays.
-Friday nights contain little or no brain power.
-A student will have at least one class each semester that he or she cannot stand.
-A student will have at least one class each semester that he or she cannot understand.
-Graduation day is the end of the world and the foreseeable future.
-A trip to Wal-Mart is the highlight of your week.
-Going to lunch or dinner in the cafeteria with a significant other would constitute a date.
-Dating couples can be spotted across campus.
-Lengths of dating relationships can be predicted down to the day.
-Coffee can be used as a bribe for many different things.
-Students would pay extra to have coffee run through the campus drinking fountains.
-Caffeine is considered a food group.
-Ice Cream is a reasonable option for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
-Dorm life is an experience that one will never forget.
-Dorm life is an experience that one wishes they would forget.
-Anything without a name on it is up for grabs.
-Anything with a name on it is up for grabs.
-No matter how many times you see a person fall up the steps with an armful of books, it will still be funny.
-Hilarious, actually.
-If you are brave enough to root for a rival team while on campus, you are brave enough to withstand the consequential swirly.
-Morning people are more annoying at 8am classes than they are at 9am classes.
-Time in the shower and/or in front of the mirror is rationed.
-So is toilet paper.
-The Library is a place of necessity, not of want.
-So is the cafeteria.
-Professors possess many things like Master’s degrees, Doctorates, and your entire college career and unforeseeable future.
-Package slips in your mailbox are to be removed and promptly bragged about to whoever is in the mailroom trying to get their box open.
-That is, if you can get YOUR box open.
-Learning comes in many shapes and sizes. Sometimes they look like the letters “A,” “B,” or “See you next semester!”